Break Up with Your 'Shoulds'

I wanted to share something with you guys.  A little personal:  I recently experienced a breakup.  That's right.  A breakup.  And, I know some of you are like, "Wait a minute, Robyn, I know you're married.  What's the deal?  What's this breakup with?"  The breakup is with my "shoulds".  Watch this week's video to hear about it.

I think we all have them.  It's when we feel like we should do something, or we should feel something, or there's something we should say to someone.  These are the shoulds.  And, I just recently broke up with mine. 

I can't tell you how amazing this feels.  I feel amazing.  I know they are still there, but I definitely broke up with them.  And, it started with today.  It started today with getting ready to come in here and, you know, meet with people and do what I love to do helping people and picking an outfit. 

It might sound silly, but I initially put on an outfit that I felt I should wear this to work.  This represents the professional part of me.  This represents the part of me that feels put together, that feels like I'm capable and I should be presenting myself this way to my clients. 

And then I said, "Wait a minute."  I'm not comfortable.  It's tighter in places where I don't want it to be and looser in places--I mean, I just--I didn't want to wear that.  And, I decided that I wasn't going to. 

Instead, I decided I'm going to wear what I want to wear today because it makes me feel good.  And you know what?  I have been so comfortable all day.  Super comfy.  Stretchy pants.  Yay! 

Anyway, in just by making that one shift, I've noticed how much I have said no to the shoulds in my life today.  Just today. 

This is, again, this is really on this micro level, but I wanted to share this with you because we have opportunities every single moment of every day to say no to our shoulds, to listen to what's coming up:  "What do I think I should do right now?  What are others telling me I should do or feel or say?  And does this align with who I am?  Does this align with my values and my beliefs?  Does it align with how I want to feel today?"

So, I want to encourage those of you out there like me who sometimes suffer and battle with our shoulds.  And see if you can take the leap--I'm going to challenge you and see if you can break up with your shoulds.  Even if it's just for a moment.  Even if it's for a day.  Even if its for one specific experience. 

The next time you have that urge or that kind of tug at "ugh, I should do this."  I want you to just pause and say, "What is it that I want to do and how will this serve me?" Just see if you can shift a little bit.  Break up with that should.  Give yourself some freedom. 

If this has been helpful, great.  I would love to hear from you.  Reach out to me.  You can call me directly at 714-390-1652.  And if the shoulds are something that you struggle with and you would like some help, great.  Call me.  I'd love to be that person to help you break up with them.